all good things

Some unpleasant things have happened at work lately. Unfortunately I am not allowed to go into great detail about them at the moment because my employers are afraid that if it got out then lawyers, judges, paralegals, and the dreaded 'A Current Affair' will get involved, which will then make John Howard look bad (not that he looks any good now) and he will be forced to come up here and get all Jackie Chan on my bosses (and by "getting all Jackie Chan" I actually mean he will send them a threatening e-mail, written by his hired grunts, then wave his huge bushy eyebrows in a self-righteous manner). To be completely honest I am not worried about what’s going on. In the long run I will either be fired, or end up making more money, and since I have about as much company loyalty as a chicken has to KFC I really don't care. What has got me pissed about this whole thing is the fact that I have been lied to since I started working there. To be fair I must point out that this isn't my employers fault. They were kept in the dark as much as I was, and as soon as they found out they told me. It is the head office that kept their mouths shut and hoped it would all go away. Those lying bastards.

So what I am getting at is I am completely sick and tired of being lied to. Honestly how hard is it for people to tell the truth?? I never lie (this isn't a moral choice or anything, I just can't lie to save my life) so I am easily duped by people who have even a mediocre ability in spinning the truth. I want this to stop. If I can't lie then no one else should be allowed to either, it just plain isn't fair. Unfortunately I get lied to a lot; usually by the people I trust the most. Like this one girl, who for like 6 months kept telling me she wasn't ready for a relationship blah blah blah, and then, with all the subtly of a slap to the face, she starts playing house with some mouth breathing moron. Because of that I was an emotional wreck for over a year, and I know have a complete hatred for all things woman, including, but not limited to: Ovaries, long hair, lipstick, eye-shadow, bikinis, panties, bras, boobs, hair removal products, the colour pink, the colour peach, Holden Barinas, Cosmopolitans, Tequila Sunrises, 1/2 of the 'Friends' group, handbags, high-heeled shoes, rings, Helen Hunt, Helen Keller, Helen of Troy, Shampoo, and field hockey. All of this could have been avoided if she had simply told the truth from the beginning. Nothing fancy, just a quick "you don't float my boat" and it would have been fine.

But the real noodle-scratcher is why do people lie?? Is it to spare my feelings?? To absolve their guilt?? Make them look good?? Well, with this girl it was none of the above. According to an e-mail I got from her a couple of months ago it seems that if she told the truth from the start it would have saved both of us a lot of suffering. As for the looking good part, well that didn't work out too well either because she is now on my list of people who are worthy of my contempt (not as worthy as those lying bastards from work though, they are just faceless names, so they are easier to feel nothing for. As for the girl, we did have some good times, so that makes up for some of it).

So I am now forced to disbelieve anything anyone tells me. I will consider everything someone tells me as a lie unless they can prove it with at least 3 independent sources. This might make me sound like a bitter cynical arsehole, but hey, it's not like I ain't that already. All good things must come to an end.... including all these damn lies.